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Date of Birth
Today Jason was born. It was a hard & long process. I mean, it took about an hour to assemble him! It also took sacrifice from the mother in the form of hot glue gun burns, but it was worth it. -
Rolled over for the first time
This boy be rollin like a bowling ball. -
Crawled for the first time
This child be crawlin like... oh crap what crawls? Bugs? Nah, I'm not comparing my baby to a gross insect. So... this child be crawlin -
First Steps
This kid by walkin...yeah I'm not good at these similes. -
First Words
His first word was hell. Yes, hell. Maybe he was trying to say hello? I don't know, maybe I'm raising a demon. Guess we'll find out. -
Pedaled a tricycle for the first time
They see me rollin, they hatin. Oh wait I could've used that for the rolling milestones. Damn. -
Potty Trained
...yeah I'm not getting into this one -
Learned to write
I mean he had already been drawing, but I don't consider that as important. He did manage to draw that "Chinese" S that we all drew as kids. How did that even happen? Is that consider drawing or writing? More importantly how did we all draw the same random S as kids? -
Started school
You would think he would still have enough attachment to me, his mother, to struggle with leaving me. Nope, he left & didn't look back. That was fun. -
Learned how to read
Maybe one day Jason will find this timeline & read it for himself. Eh, he'll probably get bored halfway through. -
Lost first tooth
What am I supposed to do with his baby teeth? Do I keep them? Do I throw them away? If I do keep it, where do put it? Do I really want to keep his baby teeth until he's 35 & still living in my house? Ah, no. -
Ride a bike for the first time
This boy got more balance & coordination than me. -
First sports game
He begged me so I let him join a little league baseball team. Not going to lie, the kid's pretty talented. He's got some natural athleticism. Wonder who he got it from, because it was definitely not me. -
Growth spurt
Yes, I'm pretty sure he's gonna hit puberty soon... once again, not something I'm gonna go into detail about.