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European trade with Africa becomes well established
That's great. or is it...... Look at this picture. Isn't it funny. It's a cat with a lime peel on its head!!! -
East India Company collapses due to Sepoy Rebellion; British Raj begins
Did you know the Sepoys rebelled because the gun cartridges they were given were greased with cow fat. That's it. Doesn't that just suck for the British? It could have been so easily avoidable. But the British were a bunch of racist meanies, so I don't really care. -
Suez Canal links the Mediterranean and Red Seas
YAY!!!!!!! the Suez canal made travel easier for the meanie British and people like that. An also, suez sounds like sue, which is a name. YAY!!!!! EVEN FUNNER!!!! -
Berlin Conference convenes to discuss terms for African colonization
And everyone was invited except for the African Leaders. weirdd.... and that's why I chose this picture. In case you can't read it, it says "You are SO not invited to my Bat Mitzvah", but just pretend it says "You are SO not invited to my mucho uber fun conference fiesta of joy where we're going to talk about your country's future and your not invited in case I haven't mentioned that yet because we're racist meanies who don't bathe." -
Queen Liluokalani takes the throne of Hawaii
Queen Liluokalani was a nice person. Also, she wrote music. Like Yo-Yo Ma! Wait, does Yo-Yo Ma write music or does he just play it? Oh well, whatever, he's still super cool. You know his CD is called Yo-Yo Ma and Friends, or something like that. Isn't that cute! -
Ethiopians defeat the invading Italians at the Battle of Adwa
um, i actually don't remember reading this. but the italians made pasta. -
Spanish-American War breaks out; Puerto Rico, Spain, and the Philippines taken from Spain
yay hey, look at the picture i chose. it's actually somewhat relevant. aren't you proud of me! -
Boer War in South Africa
boer means farmer in dutch. cool, huh. I know how to say arm in spanish. but i'm not going to tell you. it's a secret. yeah, so the poor boers had to keep moving because of the zulus and british and they used guerilla tactics and it was the first total war. : ) and also boer sounds like boar. Aren't you proud that I actually did the assingment and I actually talked about the Boer War like I was supposed to? I know, I'm such a dedicated student. -
Most of Africa is under European control
that's too bad. jeez, why can't everyone just leave everyone else alone? guess what i'm watching right now? do you give up? ok, i'll tell you. I'm watching American Idol audition week!!!! YAY!
